People always ask me this question so much I feel like I should just be honest and say what’s real. Usually when I am asked this question I give the common responses:
- I haven’t met the right one
- I’m getting to know me right now.
- No one’s ready for me.
- I’m not interested in anyone/ I don’t like anyone
- I like being alone. Not ready to change my lifestyle to add someone new.
That’s usually just my vague way of responding to either get someone off my back or to avoid looking lame and unwanted. But, for one moment, I am going to bare all to my followers and those who care to read this. None of the above is 100% truth and I will explain why. (This is my first time being 100% honest of why I am single so bare with me lol)
I haven’t met the right one- There’s a big possibility that I have met the right one. There’s a possibility that I ran him off. There’s a possibility that I will never meet the one because I am extrememly introverted and I am also anti-social. This could be one of the biggest reasons why I am single. I will explain why I feel this way in a minute.
I’m getting to know me right now- Yeah I spend probably 95% of my time getting to know myself and I swear I learn something new each day. If getting to know me and what I like is what I have to achieve before I find love, I will most likely be single for the rest of my life. I am extremely indecisive and I will explain more about that in a minute as well. (hang in there…if ur still reading)
No one’s ready for me- I agree with this but I think I agree with it so much that I don’t give people a chance to prove to me that they are ready for me.
I’m not interested in anyone/ I don’t like anyone- I think I purposely push guys away to make sure that I can continue to say this. Sadly, at this moment I really don’t have anyone that interest me. So we’ll move to the last one.
I like being alone. Not ready to change my lifestyle to add someone new- Anyone that knows me personally KNOWS I am a big loner. I take introvert to another level and things get extreme when you add that I am anti-social and shy. All of this multiplied to the tenth power because of my anxiety issues.
My anxiety is the ultimate reason why I am single. I spend so much time in my own head thinking of all the craziest scenerios that can take place that I never give anyone a fighting chance. If you come at me with some type of game I will see it a mile away and run in the opposite direction. Sometimes that’s not even the intent but my anxiety always makes me run. I don’t want to be the type the sees the signs but ignores it just for the sake of saying I have someone. I’ve seen too many of my friends and sisters played to not avoid the same situation. My imagination is out of this world so I mentally prepare myself for the worst in every relationship.
I’ve had 2 really good relationships in my life that I can honestly say that I was the reason that we’re no longer together. I spent most of the relationship in my own head with a full script for the both of us as if it were a tv show, but he wouldn’t get the script. And when he didn’t do what my script said I would think of the craziest things.
I have actually grown to accept that I will be single for the rest of my life and that no one is ready for me. In reality, I’m just not ready to expose all of me for someone to actually accept it…and for me to accept that they actually accept me. (make sense?) I don’t feel anyone should have to even deal with a person like me. It’s exhausting just for myself, I know it must be for someone else. And on the flip side, I’d date someone like me because they’d get me lol. See what I mean? Indecisive.
Don’t get me wrong now, there’s nothing wrong with being alone. And I actually enjoy being alone but I also LOVE love…and I love being in love. I’ve been single so long that I am not sure I am ready to let go the lifestyle I’ve grown accustomed to as a loner. But I love love so what is a girl to do?
I wrote this mainly because I get asked this so much. Seems like people think I’m so chill lol. If you could spend an hour in my head you would tell me to chill and relax lol. Most people are quick to blame others for the reason that they are single forgetting that we all play a role in a relationship. Own up to what you did wrong that may have caused a relationship to fail or keeping you from finding a solid relationship. Whether it’s insecurities, jealousy, infidelity, selfishness, clinginess etc. If you don’t own up to it you will most likely repeat the same actions in your next relationship.
*Off my podium*